she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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