You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
two words...techno handjob
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
