I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i don't like sucking hair
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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