i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
