Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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