I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize
