Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
