i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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