i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
