He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Randomize
