Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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