And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize