I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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