my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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