if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
