WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I need to stop coming to work sober
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Randomize
