Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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