just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
