absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
