I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
