Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
