I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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