he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
