By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize