is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize