did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
