Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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