if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Church boner. Awkwardddd
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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