sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
