this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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