so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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