Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
