I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize