No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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