Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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