do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
