mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Randomize
