Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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