Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
