He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
There was a lot of him and a little penis
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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