ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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