Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
