I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
