I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Banned from zoo.
Again?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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