why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
