So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize