I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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