You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Randomize
