i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Randomize