How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Randomize
