so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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